10 Dumb Laws
by Masih
Summary: These are 10 real life laws. Seriesly! There real laws! So I put some little excerps on what could happen...
1. China: You must be intellagent

**Dumb law 1: China: To go to college you must be intelligent.**

"I can not believe it! I just can not believe it!" cried Peter in distress.

"What is it, Peter? Bad news?" asked Mrs. Pevencie.

"I'll say! This college turned me down because I'm 'not intelligent enough to participate in serton classes'!" he cried.

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><p><strong>This is dumb law one. This is an accually Law! No wonder Chinese people are so dag nam smart! Anywho, look forword for the next 10 dumb laws!<strong>

**Please review!**

**Love you all!**

**~Massy~**


	2. Idaho: Fifty pounds of candy

**Dumb Law 2: Idaho: It is illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less then fifty pounds.**

"Do you have a heavier box of candy?" asked Arthur.

"Son," said the manager of the general store, "I have given you two twenty pound boxes of candies. I think your girlfriend would be happy with a box with ten pieces of candy."

"No, Sir, Phillis isn't my girlfriend yet. I'm trying to woo her."

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><p><strong>Remember that guy in Prince Caspian who's weird and bugs Susan? I don't know his name so I'm just going to call him Arthur. If anyone know's his rill name (you know, like the movie charictar) please let me know, I'd like to know.<strong>

**What do you guys think? Weird law, huh?**

**Please review!**

**Love you all!**

**~Massy~**


	3. Connecticut: Cann't go faster then 65

**Dumb Laws 3: Connecticut: You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.**

"Car?"

"Check"

"Chain?"

"Check"

"Bicycle?"

"Check"

"Peter, Edmund, I think this is a really bad idea…" started Susan.

"Nah. This'll be fun!" Edmund said optimistically.

Peter and Edmund hooked the chain to the car and bike to the chain.

"Ready?" asked Peter at the position behind the wheel.

"Ready!" confirmed Edmund from on the bicycle.

"Oh Aslan," prayed Susan.

-8-8-8-8-8-

"What seems to be the problem, officer?" asked Peter.

"You are pulling bicycle behind your car with a person on it! That's extremely dangerous! Not only that, you were going over 65 miles an hour!"

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><p><strong>You got to admit, that would be <em>really <em>fun! Except when you got introuble for it... But really, one of these days I want to try that... in Connecticut... going 64 miles per hour...**

**Heads up! Next Dumb Law will be set in Narnia or more accuratly Archenland. Just so you guys know.**

**Please review!**

**I've really enjoyed the dumb laws that you guys have told me in the reviews! I cracked up when I read them. Though I'm not going to use them because these laws have been pre-picked and I already know what laws I'm going to be writing about. Though if I can get 5 reviews of people asking me to do more dumb laws, I'll do it _and_ I'll do sudjestions too.**

**Love you all!**

**~Massy~**


	4. Alabama: No Bear wrestling

**Dumb Law 4: Alabama: Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.**

"Take that, Bear!"

**WRARRR!**

This is what woke King Lune from his peaceful slumber.

Disturbed by what this might be, the old king decided to go out to the courtyard from which he heard the noises and see what was going on.

Upon reaching the courtyard, King Lune found his youngest son in a wrestling match with one of the Buggily Bears of Narnia.

Corin was just about to punch the talking bear in the nose when the king decided to interrupt there… uhem… bonding time.

"Corin! If you punch one of our allies again, I'll take away your privileges for a month!" The threat of taking away of privileges proved to be very helpful.

"Father, we're not fighting, we're bonding! I'm helping strengthening our bond with Narnia by having a good old time with a friend!"

"Corin, go to your room."

"But-!"

"Corin!"

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><p><strong>Yeah, I got a case of writers block. It sucks. Anywho, I saw this law and it just screamed Corin! So what could I do? I had to put it in and make the sunario be about Corin Thunder Fist. <strong>

**Update on the Quote Stories: I'm not giving up on them. I'm just taking a brake because I don't quite know how to write the next chapter because I was wanting it to be the last, because I have some ideas for the other quote stories that you lovely people have given me. So I'll try, I said TRY, to get the next chapter up by 28. But that might not be possible because I have to get ready to go to camp in June. Btw, my birthday is in the first full week of June so if you want to make me happy write a PM or Review or a Fic for me, I'll just love you guys all the more if you do one of those! And that reminds me, I'd like to know when your guys' birthdays are so I know when I should start writing your birthday presents ;)**

**Welp, got to go, it's thunder storming here so I got to turn of the computer. Hope to see reviews one this when I get back on!**

**Love you all! **

**~Massy~**


	5. Australia:No dressing like a cat burglar

**Dumb Law 5: Australia: It is illegal to roam the streets wearing black clothes, felt shoes and black shoe polish on your faces these items are the tools of a cat burglar.**

CRUNCH!

"SSSHHH!"

"I'm trying!"

"SSSHHH!"

"You 'ssshhh'!"

"No, you dumb ass, be quiet! It won't help that we're wearing black cloths and black shoe polish on our faces if you keep up that unearthly noise. It's liable to wake the dead!"

"Oh, shut up."

The two boys kept walking it started to drissle... and the day had started out sunshiny... go figure

CRASH! BOOM! BANG!

"Ha! My turn to say 'ssshhh'… SSSHHH!"

"As soon as we get the yellow and green rings, I'm going to strangle you."

The other just snickered.

Neither of them had noticed a man walking quietly behind them when…

"Cat burglars, eh?"

The boy's jumped a mile high. They spun around seeing a constable right behind them.

"Told you we should have dressed as workers…"

"Shut up."

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><p><strong>The boys are Peter and Edmund set in LB when they went to get those green and yellow rings to try to get to Narnia. The first to go CRUNCH was Edmund. Just thought it would clear some stuff up for you... Oh and Edmund was the first to speak after the boys jumped. Also it's in the brod day light... or in a storm most likely I should say.<strong>

**Please review! Remember, I need 5 reviews from people to talk me in to doing more the 10 dumb laws. I think I only have 2... maybe 3... but as you can see, I still need people to ask for them. And it won't do any good for you to ask more then once.**

**Pleas review!**

**Love you all!**

**~Massy~**


	6. PA & WY:Fishing with dynomite & firearm

**Dumb Law: Pennsylvania: Dynamite is not to be used to catch fish.**

**Dumb Law: Wyoming: Using a firearm to fish is strictly forbidden.**

BANG!

"You ass! you missed it!"

"Nah uh! I hit it!"

Peter groaned, "Do you see any dead fish floating any where?"

Edmund looked around, "Maybe the bullet sunk it."

Peter rolled his eyes, "Dumby, the bullets most likely passed thru it."

"Fine! I missed it. But if I had dynamite it would have died," said Edmund.

Peter rolled his eyes. Finding his scaly victim he cocked the hammer of his six round colt pistol. Peter lined up the sights of his hand gun and pulled back the trigger with the pad of his finger.

BANG!

"Ha! I'm a better shot then you, Ed!"

Edmund scowled, "I'm telling you I could have gotten it if I had dynamite."

Peter paused from his search for a fish to grin at Ed, "I bet you wouldn't be able to."

"Oh you don't, do you? Well buster, prepare to get beat!" challenged Edmund who stood and started to walk away.

"Wait. Where are you going?" asked Peter.

"Back to town to get some sticks of dynamite," Edmund replied.

"No wait! I was just playing! Ed! Ed!" yelled Peter, but his cries went unheard by his younger brother.

**Firearms&Dynamite**

The store clerk was really making Edmund not feel so great about himself. He was on the verge, the _verge_, of not "doing anything stupid".

But Edmund, being Edmund, got the dynamite anyway.

"So either you're going to chicken out or get us in big trouble," Peter said sarcastically once Edmund got back.

"Why would we get in trouble?" asked Edmund.

"In case you have never noticed, dynamite goes boom. Not a little boom, but a big BOOM!" Peter clarified.

"Well duh!" Edmund said back, "I'm not that dumb!"

Peter rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I'm not too sure about that."

Edmund made a face back, "So how are we going to do this?"

"We? It's you who's doing it."

"I was talking to myself in third person," Edmund retorted.

Peter hid his smile.

Looking around, Edmund's eyes landed on some rotten wood, this gave him an idea.

Taking some wire from god knows where, the first stick of dynamite, and a piece of rotten wood and tied them all together.

"Got any matches?" asked Peter who was watching Edmund closely.

Edmund nodded his head and took out a box of matches. Edmund placed the dynamite in the water, the rotten wood making it float, and took a match and lighted the fuse and pushed the stick of dynamite out further in the water.

"You should stand back here with me, Ed," said Peter. Edmund turned around and walked all two steps to stand beside his brother.

They watched as the fire got closer and closer to the stick. They started to count down.

8…

7…

6…

"Maybe we should get fur-"

**KAHBOOM!**

Peter and Edmund opened there eyes to see that they were laying on their backs completely drenched and in the mud.

"Well that was fantastic, Ed! You made dynamite explode in the water getting us soaked and reduced the water level of the lake and you did all this without killing one fish!"

Edmund hung his head in shame then he heard his brother yelp in surprise. Looking up, he found that a dead fish was laying in Peter's lap. Edmund was about to ask what happened when something hit his head and fell in to his lap to. Looking down, Edmund saw a dead fish.

Both brothers looked at each other than to the sky to see hundreds of black speaks that seemed to be… dead fish!

"Hurry! get out of the way!" Edmund yelled pulling Pete to his feet and rushed them under some trees to watch as hundreds of fish came falling to the ground or the lake.

"Now what are we going to tell mum?" Edmund said mostly to himself.

Edmund seeing that Peter was in a dazed state snapped his fingers in front of Peter face. Peter woke from his state.

"Whoa! That was totally awesome! Let's do it again!"

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><p><strong>I'm sorry, I know this is two laws but I couldn't very well make seperate one's for each because they were to much alike.<strong>

**Please Review!**

**Okay, sence writing the above I was listening to National Treaser 1 being played on the tv and the writers messed up on a fact! I'm really ticked! How could they do that? They should have fact checked! Grrr! Sorry, I'm a History and a Political geek. If you seen the movie, have you seen the sean that Ben says, "The Founding Fathers left us clews"? It's in that seen that they messed up. If any one can tell me what the fact was, how it was wrong and tell me what is corect, I'll do a shout out to who ever answeres corectly and I'll be nice and do a shout out to who is wrong and then I'll put the corect answer out so you guys may know. Also, depending on your answer, I'll write a specal fic for you.**

**Love you all!**

**~Massy~**


	7. Texas: 24 hour notice

**Dumb Law 7: Texas: To help against crime all criminals need to give their victims a 24 hour notice, either vocal or written, before they commit a crime against them, explaining the nature of their crime against them.**

**Betaed by ForeverTEAtime**

Peter and Edmund sat at a booth in an ice cream shop trying to decide the best way to get the gold and green rings from the home that Professor Kirke had lived in as a boy. They had already decided that in two days time they were to go in the dead of night dressed as construction workers to retrieve the hidden rings, but Edmund had his doubts.

"I don't know, Peter… Don't you think we should let the owners of the property know that at least something will happen then? I mean, I'd feel guilty knowing that to them all's well one day, and then when they wake up the next day there's a giant, mud hole in their yard."

"Ed, they have a tree there, remember? Kirke said that shortly after he and Aunt Polly had buried the rings a tree grew over them. We'll just dig up the tree, get the rings, and then replant the tree so that the owners don't notice anything."

"Pete, that tree is colossal by now! We'll never be able to move it for our lives! We'll need to dig a hole under the tree and retrieve the box and then put the dirt back and the people will know someone has been there digging something up."

"Pfft, whatever. They'll have no way to find us."

"I'll still feel guilty. Come on, Pete! We don't even need to leave our names. Please?"

Peter sighed, "I'm going to strangle you if you don't just shut up and start writing the letter."

Edmund smiled, "Thanks," then he went straight to work on an appropriate letter.

**A Short Time Later at the Victims House…..**

"Darling, listen to this letter we just received. It goes:

_Dear Owner,_

_My brother, my sister, our elderly friends, our cousin, and his friend are on a quest to find something; and we believe that it is buried in your yard somewhere. My brother and I shall come to your residence and see if we can find it in the dead of night. Do not be alarmed to find mud holes scattered all over your landscape._

_Sincerely yours,_

_Seeker_

"What a particularly odd letter. Is it true or is it just a prank?"

"I wish I had the answer, my Darling. Perhaps we should call for a constable to come and stand guard just in case though."

"That is a good idea."

**Later That Night….**

"Ed, quite whistling; you'll wake everyone up."

"It's not like I'm whistling loudly or anything."

Peter rolled his eyes, but remembered that his brother couldn't see him in the dark, "Just shut up and don't make anymore sound."

Silence fell upon the two then Edmund broke it. "Peter, are we almost there?"

Peter groaned in contempt, "No."

Edmund was quiet for a little bit again. Then, "Are we there yet?"

Peter, still annoyed from the first time he asked, answered, "No."

There was another pause from Edmund. "Peter, are we-"

Peter couldn't take it anymore, "No! No, we are not there yet, you little-!"

Edmund interrupted Peter by clapping his hand over his brother's mouth, "SSSHHH! You're going to wake everyone up, you fool!" Edmund loudly whispered.

"Well, quit asking and acting like a child!" Peter whisper yelled back.

Edmund was about to remark back when they heard, "Oi! Who goes there? Go on! Answer me!"

Peter was about to tell the constable that they were just workers coming home late, when Edmund opened his mouth and spoke first.

"Arrrrrg! We beeeee the old buccaneerrrrrrs! We arrrrre here to dig up ye old treasurrrrrre!"

Peter slapped his hand against his forehead. How did he get stuck with such an idiot for a brother?

**Please Review!**

**Thanks to Humphrey loves Kate for guessing what it is that's wrong with the National Treaser movie. The answere is accually that paper money was not invented until the Lincoln administration. None of the founding fathers were alive at that time. There to for, they had no hand in putting a clue on the American doller.**

**Love you all!**

**~Massy~**

**PS I also fixed up the last chapter so it's longer and hopefully funnier. So go back and read and reveiw it please!**


	8. North Carolina: No singing off key

**Dumb Law 8: North Carolina: It's against the law to sing off key.**

**Thanks to foreverTEAtime for betaing this fic**

_Got a little boom in my big truck_

_Gonna open up the doors and turn it up_

_Gonna stomp my boots in the Georgia mud_

_Gonna watch you make me fall in love_

_Get up on the hood of my daddy's tractor_

_Up on the tool box, it don't matter_

_Down on the tailgate_

_Girl I can't wait_

_To watch you do your thing_

Lucy banged on the door to the bathroom, "Peter! Quit singing!"

Her voice was drowned out by the sound of hissing water and Peter's off-key singing.

_Shake it for the young bucks sittin' in the honky-tonks_

_For the rednecks rockin' 'til the break of dawn_

_The DJ spinnin' that country song_

_C'mon, c'mon, c'mon_

_Shake it for the birds, shake it for the bees_

_Shake it for the catfish swimmin' down deep in the creek_

_For the crickets and the critters and the squirrels_

_Shake it to the moon, shake it for me girl_

Edmund came and started pounding on the door with Lucy. "Come on Peter! If you don't quit singing, I'll call Eustace and tell him to call the British Parliament to outlaw off-key singing!"

This didn't seem to disturb Peter from his persistent, torturous singing of Luke Bryan's song, Country Girl.

_Aw, country girl, shake it for me_

_Girl, shake it for me_

_Girl, shake it for me_

_Country girl, shake it for me_

_Girl, shake it for me_

_Girl, shake it for me_

This time Susan came to bang on the bathroom door, "Shut up, Peter! You're so annoying. I need the bathroom! You're using up all the hot water! You're a bad singer! I bet bad singing is already outlawed because of you! Now get your butt out here!"

Mystically, Peter turned off the water to the shower and quit singing. Causing the banging and threats to cease. Lucy, Edmund, and Susan heard Peter get out of the shower _still_ humming off key.

Finally, Peter opened the door to find his sibling lined up outside, the effect of finding them standing out there, all looking peeved, caused him to stumble back a step or two.

"You're a bad singer," Edmund said walking away.

"Seriously, give up singing," Lucy said.

Susan looked Peter square in the face, "You should really listen to them."

She walked away with Lucy right behind her, leaving Peter shocked and slightly miffed.

"_Somebody_ woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

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><p><strong>Wow! Just posted chapter 8! We're almost done, that's awesome . After I finish the last chapter, I'll start a new fic with the dumb laws or good laws as you might want me to do. So for this and the next two chapters would be a good time to submit the laws you want me to do.<strong>

**Also, if you haven't already, I rewrote chapter 6 so please go back, read it and comment on it.**

**Please review.**

**Love you all!**

** Massy **


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